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Location: Midwest, United States

Thursday, August 03, 2006

I Made Myself Laugh (sorta)

Blogging, for me, is a stream-of-consciousness-thing. A river of thought flows and swirls constantly through my head. There are times when a fully formed thought drifts by, so I grab it, put it into words and post an entry. Sometimes the thought is formless, but I know it is something important (important to me, anyway). The “thoughtlet” needs more time. It needs to find a quiet cove where it can grow in truth and substance. I’ve resorted to creating title entries and placing them in a folder as a prompt to revisit particular ideas, thoughts or emotions. At any given time, I may have five or six titles awaiting text. I may occasionally add a note or two, or I may simply give my subconscious mind time to mull and ponder a while longer.

I opened the folder today and found this title: “Character Flaw.” There was no text.

Character Flaw…the topic is driving me crazy. What did I mean to say? What, exactly, was I pondering? I did a quick “flaw review” and simply gave up. I have too many. For the life of me, I cannot remember which flaw it was that prompted me to create that title. It must have been significant. It must have been something that caused me discomfort, perhaps even anguish…something I felt I had to examine and reexamine further. Silly me. I had forgotten what it was in me that required contemplation and confession. Flaws? I have too many. I was overwhelmed. I gave up.

After a half-hour of head scratching, I just had to laugh. I had ventured forth on a fool’s errand…

I deleted the file.

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Blogger soul_rebel said...


you're welcome. :)

Fri Aug 04, 02:04:00 AM  
Blogger Jonas said...

Thanks, Reb. Oh, how I wish forgetfulness was my worst flaw!

No, I've others of greater consequence. I've even been told that by associating with me one could lose custody of one's children...

Maybe forgetfulness is a defense mechanism, rather than a flaw?

Fri Aug 04, 08:58:00 AM  

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