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Location: Midwest, United States

Saturday, June 09, 2012

Another Spill



Just a coupla weeks ago, I noted that the harder I pedal, the more perilous the ride.

Well, I had me another spill two days ago.

I wish I could claim it was just another heroic episode in a series of epic, death-defying adventures as told by bronze, immortal Adonis, me.

Yeah.  I wish.

The bald truth is that I came to a bad end whilst trying to stop for a rest break after two+ hours of continuous cycling.  I was far more spent than I realized.  Far clumsier than I wish to admit.  My pedal cleats worked exactly the way they were engineered to work.  My synapses and reflexes?  They function erratically.

It was kinda a slow-motion fall.  I knew I was gonna fall before I fell.  Funny thing, I didn’t suffer that much personal damage, as in skin lost and blood spilled.  Elbow blood mostly.  Of course, at the rate I’m going, these county roads will have extracted a pound of flesh by harvest time...but that’s still a long ways off.  I wasn’t so much physically hurt as decidedly upset with myself.  Sure, I lost a bit o’ skin.  Lost a drop o’ blood or two.  But I looked at my bicycle and noted I bent the brake lever.  Tore the handlebar tape to shreds.  Ripped the saddle.  Rolled the tire right off the rim.  Tore my jersey at the shoulder and tore my shorts at the hip.    Oh, Sweet Jeebus, now I gotta pay for my mishaps with coin of the realm!  That’s just salt in the wounds, brothers and sisters.  Salt in the wounds.

As I sat by the side of the road, remounting the tire on the rim and reflecting upon my doofusness/doofosity, I realized that what I needed most in life was a cycling buddy.

Someone who’d extend a hand to help me back on my feet.  Someone to objectively survey the damage and offer reassurance (or call for an ambulance).  Someone to sit next to me, swatting at flies, while I fixed a flat.

Someone who’ll be glad I’m all right, while noting how hysterically funny /stupid I looked whilst crashing.

Yeah, I need me one of those.

Meanwhile, I went to my local drugstore and bought me an industrial-size bottle of “Pain Relieving Antiseptic Spray.

Methinks I’m gonna need it.

I've got a 20-mile “tempo ride” planned for tomorrow morning.

Pray for me.

* * *

8 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hope you heal quickly Jonas. I don't like to cycle but I do enjoy the hard exercise. Must get back to it. I'm squishy in places I never squished before. Most distressing.

Chin up Jonas, or should I say, feet on ground?

Sat Jun 09, 10:09:00 PM  
Blogger Selma said...

No more falls please, Jonas. We need you in one piece.

Sun Jun 10, 02:44:00 AM  
Blogger Marion said...

Well, if nothing else, you got a good tale from your fall. I was rubbing my own elbows by the end of the read. I had one serious bicycle wreck when I was 12 years young. I still recall the pain of my skinned knees and wounded pride.

P'raps a seat belt is in order, Jonas...LOL! Just kidding. xo

Sun Jun 10, 01:51:00 PM  
Blogger Jonas said...

Thank you Lilith, Selma and Marion for your concerns about my personal safety. I'm grateful that you care.

Here's the thing: my "inner child" has been grinning lately. Thinking back on my early youth, I recall band-aids by the hundreds. I swear, in practically every photograph taken of me before age 12, there was a band-aid or scab somewhere on my body. Skinned knees and elbows are the standard price of "youthful exuberance" (and youthful clumsiness).

I had lost that exuberance (for a few too many years). During my darkest days this past decade, I had lost...well...everything.

I can't claim I reclaimed youth. I don't think that's possible. What I've regained this year (so far) is a certain glee in being both clumsy and stupid and riding with both hands up in the air and off the handlebars. Do I look incredibly stupid (downright pathetic) when I crash to ground? You betcha.

Do I care? Not really. I've been humbled in so many ways for too long to care in the least what others may think of me.

I got a child in me that needs nurturing.

Sun Jun 10, 03:12:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'm smiling and thank you for the reminder.

Sun Jun 10, 03:54:00 PM  
Blogger Cheesy said...

I will have to change out my tires.. but I'm game!

Sun Jun 10, 09:43:00 PM  
Blogger Wine and Words said...

I think you should be proud of the fall. What is it they say? If you don't fall, you're not really skiing, or cycling, or whatever.

And then there's the rub eh....the need for a witness and helpmate in our lives. And yet here we are on a solo ride. Hard to reconcile. Very hard.

Fall again Jonas. It's better than flat tires.

Tue Jun 12, 09:37:00 PM  
Blogger Jonas said...

Thank you all, again, for your support and understanding. Yes, indeed, in some matters, the "falling" is an important part of it. The childishness, too.

Sun Jun 17, 06:29:00 PM  

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